Apparently I'm really tremendously busy with work. It's though as if I'm in a whole new world. Well, it is. Coz I've been working in my previous work as a design/project architect for about 2 years and a half, while here in my new work I'm a field architect. Which is more about building what's been drawn, solving problems from cost to construction application. It's really a challenge everyday and seems like time isn't enough in a day everyday. Some might say it's a time management issues, but if you'll look closely and if you really are in a situation like mine, you'll just end up having the same thoughts as me.
It ain't for a one person work. And come to think of it, we are working from 7AM to 4PM, Mondays-Saturdays. That's what's in the contract that I've signed. But eventually you'll realize you've been working for about 12 hours a day. It's really unhealthy and depressing to have such a day routine all over again week by week. I'm quite thinking if everything is all worth it in the end. Yes it's true that there are no times that you'll get bored coz every time is essential and every bits of it has multiple tasks to do. As well as you have so much to learn everyday. But then it's the mental, physical, and emotional aspects that are always in battle. Like everyday is a war of your life. Feels like I'm exaggerating things right? But no, I'm not. It's really the life I have right now.
Not much time for self, family and even fandom anymore and it's really sad. I know I have the choice to leave, but I still am thinking whether it's just a phase or it's really cruel. Must be a sign also that I'm not working hard enough? I don't know, perhaps I need more time to decide. Anyways, I'll do my best everyday. Coz I've signed myself into this job, so I should do what it requires and whatever succeeds in the said contract.
Personal aside, if you'll ask me what have I been stalking in fandom when I rarely have the time. It's them. Coz I still love these legends.
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